Empty Threat
Sunday, May 18, 6:30 p.m. Caller reported an open door on a property where they were house-sitting. Deputies checked the property but found nothing suspicious. No information on whether the house-sitter was able to sleep that night. Case remains ajar. La Conner Whitney Road
Joke’s On Them
Monday, May 19, 6:24 p.m. Local teens tried misleading strangers by imitating a popular online prank that had them claiming they had lost money. Prank made no cents and future puns were garnished when Deputy Willis explained just because it’s on the internet doesn’t mean it’s legal. The real crime here is anyone thinking this prank is funny. Whatever happened to rolling yards? Maybe the town needs a bowling alley. First Street.
Lab Test
Thursday, May 22, 3:56 p.m. Caller reported a black lab with tags was spotted near the Rainbow Bridge, but not crossing the Rainbow Bridge. Before Deputy Schmidt could collar the daring doggie, a mystery good Samaritan appeared and vowed to take it to the humane society. No one was ruffed up. Pioneer Highway.
Crash Test Dummy
Saturday, May 24, 2:30 a.m. A late-night driver created a drive-thru where there was none. Witnesses say the car was speeding like it was trying to win the Indy 500 before it hit the wall. Deputy Greaves located the vehicle and driver and awarded the driver with a DUI and reckless driving charge. Morris Street.
Some People Snore Like That
Saturday, May 24, 10:30 p.m. An eerie chorus of unknown animal sounds had one resident howling for help. Sgt. Gonzales dutifully tested his tracking skills, but the area was quiet as a catnap. Seems even the raccoons know the town noise ordinance kicks in at 10 p.m. First Street.
Not Exactly Painting the Town Red
Sunday May 25, 12:51 a.m. Reports of midnight mischief-makers paint misbehavin’ as paintballs flew, pelting homes and cars. Deputy McGuigan scoped out the scene but found no splatter, no suspects, just a brush with silence. If you spotted the would-be Picassos, call the sheriff’s office. Maple Avenue.
Unsigned Contract
Monday, May 26, 8:30 p.m. A concerned caller dialed in to report possible construction fraud. Seems Mom may have handed over personal info to a real con-struction man. Deputy Willis is now hammering out the details. Whatcom Street.
The police blotter is a summary of recent law enforcement activity in and around La Conner.
